...we're a nursing family.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Oh, And By The Way...
...Here is a picture of Elizabeth at 4 weeks of age, wearing the same outfit Charlotte is wearing today!
5 Months Old
Oh, sweet Charlotte. I can't believe its been 5 months already! To me, that's kind of the cut-off between having a newborn and having a baby...4 months still sounds young, but 5 months? That's almost half a year! We're having Elizabeth's birthday party this weekend, and I remember at her party last year, I was only 8 weeks pregnant with you. We hadn't even told many people yet. And now you're here and we love you and you're such an amazing part of this family!
You've made some big strides in the last month. We weaned your pacifier two weeks ago, and moved you into your crib in your and Elizabeth's room. You're handling it pretty well! Night are great - Elizabeth doesn't even wake if you cry most times, and you're getting better and better about sleeping all the way through the night. Nap times are a little different story with Sissy in there, but such is life, right? We'll work it out.
You roll over front to back pretty consistently, but you've yet to roll back to tummy. You're so strong in everything you do though. You have been able to bear weight on your legs for months now, and in fact, its often times your preferred position. You can stand for minutes just holding on to a person's finger with one hand and chewing on the other hand...you definitely have your Pa's and your Mommy's strong legs!
You're drooling so very very much...in fact, your teachers at school tell me at least twice a week that they've never seen a baby drool so much! I think that's contributing to your lingering night-time restlessness a bit, but I'm not in too much of a hurry for those teeth to poke through...I just love your sweet, huge, gummy grin!
When you're mad you're MAD, but when you're happy you're SOOO happy. You seem to live life intensely...you remind me of myself in that way.
Elizabeth, Daddy, and I are so lucky to have you in our lives. You round out our family well. We're loving every minute of life with you, and can't wait to see how you will grow and develop your own unique spot in our lives and in this world. We love you!!
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Tired.
I'm tired. Exhausted. Body, mind, soul. Tired.
This week, I've got a lot on my plate. Not that I have a lot of big, important things to do, but more that there are a lot of little things that are keeping me from doing the few important things that I have to do. My mind is scattered and my soul is restless.
My former pastor once told me that she believes that, for middle-class people who don't have a lot of "oppression", evil is most often made manifest in their lives through distraction. Whether its a useless TV show or seemingly important "emergencies" that come up, distraction is what keeps us from doing the work that really matters.
This week, I'm finding that's true for me. Dentist appointments, and crammed-in baby picture sessions, and a wrecked car, and worrying about a sick husband are keeping me from focusing on writing my sermon, prayerfully preparing Sunday worship, and having patience with my children.
I know this will pass. It always does. I believe that naming the distractions for what they are is the first step. Then I can prioritize.
Charlotte's awake. Its time to attend to one of the most important things now.
This week, I've got a lot on my plate. Not that I have a lot of big, important things to do, but more that there are a lot of little things that are keeping me from doing the few important things that I have to do. My mind is scattered and my soul is restless.
My former pastor once told me that she believes that, for middle-class people who don't have a lot of "oppression", evil is most often made manifest in their lives through distraction. Whether its a useless TV show or seemingly important "emergencies" that come up, distraction is what keeps us from doing the work that really matters.
This week, I'm finding that's true for me. Dentist appointments, and crammed-in baby picture sessions, and a wrecked car, and worrying about a sick husband are keeping me from focusing on writing my sermon, prayerfully preparing Sunday worship, and having patience with my children.
I know this will pass. It always does. I believe that naming the distractions for what they are is the first step. Then I can prioritize.
Charlotte's awake. Its time to attend to one of the most important things now.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Free to Good Home
Elizabeth: Is Amma coming to see me tomorrow? (her grandmother)
Me: Yes
Elizabeth: Sometime, I want her to bring her bird with her.
Me: Well, remember, her bird died.
Elizabeth: Why?
Me: Remember, it got too old, just like everything does, and it died.
Elizabeth: Oh. (long pause) So they want me to be their pet now?
I'm not really sure what that would look like, but there are days that I'm tempted to find out.
Me: Yes
Elizabeth: Sometime, I want her to bring her bird with her.
Me: Well, remember, her bird died.
Elizabeth: Why?
Me: Remember, it got too old, just like everything does, and it died.
Elizabeth: Oh. (long pause) So they want me to be their pet now?
I'm not really sure what that would look like, but there are days that I'm tempted to find out.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Of Pure Love and Innocence
Elizabeth and I were snuggling for a moment after school today, enjoying a few precious hugs and kisses. Here's a peak at our conversation:
Me: I love you, Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: I love you too, Mommy. Ummm....Mommy?
Me: Yes?
Elizabeth: Mommy, you're the best Mommy.
Where do they learn this stuff? In a few years, I'm sure I will swear that this type of behavior is reserved for moments when she's trying to be manipulative. But, today? It was totally genuine. So sweet.
Me: I love you, Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: I love you too, Mommy. Ummm....Mommy?
Me: Yes?
Elizabeth: Mommy, you're the best Mommy.
Where do they learn this stuff? In a few years, I'm sure I will swear that this type of behavior is reserved for moments when she's trying to be manipulative. But, today? It was totally genuine. So sweet.
Friday, June 5, 2009
Field Day
Elizabeth's preschool had their annual "Field Day" today, where they get to go enjoy a bunch of fun activities in the university basketball practice court. It is the culmination of their "sports and activities" unit. They had basketball (of course), bean bag throws, egg-and-spoon races, sack races, bowling, and even sports-themed washable tattoos (I think that might have been Elizabeth's favorite part). A great time was had by all.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Mixing Her Metaphors...Or Something Like That
Elizabeth can sometimes be very roudy. She's...shall we say...an active little girl. I might even venture to say that she might be somewhat of a tomboy as she gets older.
Anyway, my husband and I tell her often to be careful, or else she might bust her head.
Apparently her teacher at school tells the kids to be careful, or they might crack their heads.
The other day, we told her to be careful, and she said, "Why? Or else I might bust my crack?"
Yeah, Elizabeth. Something like that.
Anyway, my husband and I tell her often to be careful, or else she might bust her head.
Apparently her teacher at school tells the kids to be careful, or they might crack their heads.
The other day, we told her to be careful, and she said, "Why? Or else I might bust my crack?"
Yeah, Elizabeth. Something like that.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Sweet Sounds of Laughter
Charlotte laughed for the first time today. I mean really belly laughed. I had her in a standing position and was bouncing her gently on the floor, and she apparently found that to be laughter-worthy. I must say...it was music to my ears.
Birthing Pains
I'm currently in my last year of seminary, preparing to be a United Methodist minister. Up until a couple of weeks ago, I was finishing up an internship with one of the most wonderful churches I've ever encountered. The people were loving, the worship was awesome, and the ministry was genuine. I had plans to go on staff there at the conclusion of my internship. Life was good.
But, only a few weeks before my internship was over, I found out that, with the current economy, the church couldn't afford me. They tried everything they could think of to make it work, but the numbers just wouldn't add up. Suddenly, I found myself orphaned, not knowing where I would go next, but being very sure that that season in my life was over.
I remember the pastor preaching a sermon shortly thereafter that was one of those times when you're sure the preacher is speaking directly to you. One line of the sermon was, "don't get so comfortable in one place that you start to believe you can't find God anywhere else." Whew. That did it. At that moment I knew - deep in my being - that I was done there. Like a little eagle being thrown from the nest and forced to fly, my time that this church was over. It was time for something new.
Its so hard when life moves on before you're ready.
Fortunately, the leadership in my denomination found me another church. Its a beautiful, small, country church, where I will be the solo pastor. I've never been a solo pastor, and they've never had a female pastor. Neither one of us really knows what we're getting into. I start in just a week and a half, and I'm flooded with a myriad of emotions. I'm excited and overwhelmed and scared and unsure and grateful all at the same time. I have no idea what to expect, and at times, that leaves me almost paralyzed.
I find hope and rest, however, remembering that this is not the first time I've felt this way. Just four short months ago, I awaited the birth of my second child. I remember sitting around, big and pregnant, feeling like I knew what to expect even less than I did the first time. And I was excited and overwhelmed and scared and unsure and grateful all at the same time. I had no idea what to expect, and at times, that left me almost paralyzed.
I so badly wanted to meet my new baby, but I just as badly didn't want to end the special relationship my husband and I had with our - then - only daughter, Elizabeth. What the three of us had was good - perfect, you might even say. And since I had no clue what a family of four would look like, it was really hard to be excited about giving up the known for the unknown.
But, regardless of my readiness, time kept ticking. Before I knew it, I was sitting in bed one night timing contractions in tears. Not because they hurt so much as because my heart hurt. I ached to meet my new baby, but I wasn't ready to not be pregnant any more. I wasn't ready to say good-bye to the blissfulness of having an only child. It became profoundly clear to me that in order to experience the birth of a new baby, I first had to experience the death and grief of a pregnancy ending. And ready or not, the baby was coming.
And now...well, I know that, in many ways, all those fears were ridiculous. Charlotte is amazing and brings so much joy and life to our home. I love her with a fierce, profound love, and she has only brought good to our lives. Yes, the old season had to end, but the new season is magnificent and breathtaking.
So here I am again. Its clear that a new thing is being born, and I have no idea what it will look like. There is a part of me that wants to run scared back to what is comfortable. But, alas, that's impossible. The contractions have begun. They bring with them many aches, to be sure. But it is time to get ready. In a few short days, the old will be gone, and a new relationship and season in life will be birthed.
And all I can do is seek rest and peace knowing deep in my soul that, in every death, there is rebirth and new life - life greater than we can comprehend.
Every time.
But, only a few weeks before my internship was over, I found out that, with the current economy, the church couldn't afford me. They tried everything they could think of to make it work, but the numbers just wouldn't add up. Suddenly, I found myself orphaned, not knowing where I would go next, but being very sure that that season in my life was over.
I remember the pastor preaching a sermon shortly thereafter that was one of those times when you're sure the preacher is speaking directly to you. One line of the sermon was, "don't get so comfortable in one place that you start to believe you can't find God anywhere else." Whew. That did it. At that moment I knew - deep in my being - that I was done there. Like a little eagle being thrown from the nest and forced to fly, my time that this church was over. It was time for something new.
Its so hard when life moves on before you're ready.
Fortunately, the leadership in my denomination found me another church. Its a beautiful, small, country church, where I will be the solo pastor. I've never been a solo pastor, and they've never had a female pastor. Neither one of us really knows what we're getting into. I start in just a week and a half, and I'm flooded with a myriad of emotions. I'm excited and overwhelmed and scared and unsure and grateful all at the same time. I have no idea what to expect, and at times, that leaves me almost paralyzed.
I find hope and rest, however, remembering that this is not the first time I've felt this way. Just four short months ago, I awaited the birth of my second child. I remember sitting around, big and pregnant, feeling like I knew what to expect even less than I did the first time. And I was excited and overwhelmed and scared and unsure and grateful all at the same time. I had no idea what to expect, and at times, that left me almost paralyzed.
I so badly wanted to meet my new baby, but I just as badly didn't want to end the special relationship my husband and I had with our - then - only daughter, Elizabeth. What the three of us had was good - perfect, you might even say. And since I had no clue what a family of four would look like, it was really hard to be excited about giving up the known for the unknown.
But, regardless of my readiness, time kept ticking. Before I knew it, I was sitting in bed one night timing contractions in tears. Not because they hurt so much as because my heart hurt. I ached to meet my new baby, but I wasn't ready to not be pregnant any more. I wasn't ready to say good-bye to the blissfulness of having an only child. It became profoundly clear to me that in order to experience the birth of a new baby, I first had to experience the death and grief of a pregnancy ending. And ready or not, the baby was coming.
And now...well, I know that, in many ways, all those fears were ridiculous. Charlotte is amazing and brings so much joy and life to our home. I love her with a fierce, profound love, and she has only brought good to our lives. Yes, the old season had to end, but the new season is magnificent and breathtaking.
So here I am again. Its clear that a new thing is being born, and I have no idea what it will look like. There is a part of me that wants to run scared back to what is comfortable. But, alas, that's impossible. The contractions have begun. They bring with them many aches, to be sure. But it is time to get ready. In a few short days, the old will be gone, and a new relationship and season in life will be birthed.
And all I can do is seek rest and peace knowing deep in my soul that, in every death, there is rebirth and new life - life greater than we can comprehend.
Every time.
Monday, June 1, 2009
She Rolled Over!
So, this is the impetus for this blog.
On Saturday, May 30, my youngest daughter, Charlotte, rolled over for the first time. Well, that's not totally true. She actually rolled over when she was 5 weeks old, but it was just a fluke (even though my mommy self naturally believes that she's just that advanced). So Saturday was the first real time. She was 4 months, 1 day old. Just like the books say it should happen.
My other daughter, Elizabeth, didn't roll over consistently until she was almost 7 months old! I don't know if its because she was a large baby (10 lbs, 6 oz!), or just because she didn't really have any place she needed to go. But no worries, she was walking at 10 months.
I love that my two girls give me physical reminders of their differences. It would be so easy to only see them through their commonalities otherwise. I pray that, as they grow, I will continue to recognize and celebrate the qualites that make each of them unique, and that they will be able to do the same.
On Saturday, May 30, my youngest daughter, Charlotte, rolled over for the first time. Well, that's not totally true. She actually rolled over when she was 5 weeks old, but it was just a fluke (even though my mommy self naturally believes that she's just that advanced). So Saturday was the first real time. She was 4 months, 1 day old. Just like the books say it should happen.
My other daughter, Elizabeth, didn't roll over consistently until she was almost 7 months old! I don't know if its because she was a large baby (10 lbs, 6 oz!), or just because she didn't really have any place she needed to go. But no worries, she was walking at 10 months.
I love that my two girls give me physical reminders of their differences. It would be so easy to only see them through their commonalities otherwise. I pray that, as they grow, I will continue to recognize and celebrate the qualites that make each of them unique, and that they will be able to do the same.
What This Is All About...
I'm horrible at keeping track of those oh-so-holy "mommy moments". You know, all the baby's "firsts". I bought a baby book when I was pregnant with my first daughter, filled out all the pages about Mommy and Daddy and Grandparents before she was born, and then never touched it again. In the midst of a special moment, I felt like I would remember it forever - that it was so amazing, that of course I would never forget it.
Well, almost 3 years and another baby later, let me tell you...I have.
Don't get me wrong...I don't want to be one of those people who doesn't get to live life because they're too busy recording it. But I do want to remember. I belive that there is value in reflecting on where you've been so you have a better idea about where you are now, and where you're going. I find that this is true not only with my memories of my children, but the semi-profound thoughts and revelations I have about life in general.
Thus, I begin this blog. I invite you to share with me. To laugh, cry, relate, and reflect on this beautiful and amazing journey we're on together.
Well, almost 3 years and another baby later, let me tell you...I have.
Don't get me wrong...I don't want to be one of those people who doesn't get to live life because they're too busy recording it. But I do want to remember. I belive that there is value in reflecting on where you've been so you have a better idea about where you are now, and where you're going. I find that this is true not only with my memories of my children, but the semi-profound thoughts and revelations I have about life in general.
Thus, I begin this blog. I invite you to share with me. To laugh, cry, relate, and reflect on this beautiful and amazing journey we're on together.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)